His Footsteps

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Using ur strength, i can stand up again ~

Sorry Dear readers...
was busy looking for part time Job & in a holiday mood
slack slack thats y so long nv update

So So many things happen during this few months
Family , School , Relationships
Was wondering how come suddenly so many things happen at the same time
then i recall
it's actually i ownself ask from God de
I keep asking for Breakthrough in this area that area...
hahaha...
=========================================
Dunno why
suddenly super in love with candles
these few days or rather weeks
i keep going to different places to play with candles
Just by lighting up them , see them glow
makes me very happy
i will immediately have a smile on my face~
i guess it's a way to relax myself bahh

Last few days i went to the playground at tanan merah ...
And while playing ...
God Reveal sth to me ...
I got a video for it :

God remind me sth...
In life , we will come across many trails ...
these trails will just continue to come ...
it will never end ...
Sometimes we might fall...
there may be times that we will feel lost too
Just like the candles, i keep lighting it but the wind keep blowing the flame off
But only one thing...
By using the strength of God, we can still stand up again ~
I can always depend on my God !

HAPPY B DAY MUMMY!!!

Celebrated my mummy's b day
Hahahahaha ....
Spent all my allowance on mummy's present lol
So gonna go n biscuts & milk diet le
LOL...
But it's worth it ok !
I LOVE MY MUMMY~
Here are some pictures :

My Brother anyhow-ing

Strawberry Sweetheart

Daddy buy de cake cake

Sunday, October 19, 2008

HAIX HAIX HAIX !!!

[[ I'VE ALREADY LOST ALL THAT I HAVE ]]

It's so hard nowadays

Dunno what to do ~

i feel so tired

i wanna continue

but i just feel so tired

just let u do it the way that u wan

but it become my fault in the end

I do know where i'm wrong at

I've tried but it's not enough...

Lost , Confuse ...

What to do now ?

It's so argh !!!

I totally can't control my emotion anymore

I will just cry on the bus suddenly

or even when walking halfway home

What is this ???

Family, Relationship, Friends...

feel so useless

feel so silly

feel so angry with myself

totally totally lost

I no longer know what you want

Tell me please

Don't keep quiet

I very xin ku liddat

I need support too u know~

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Exam is finally over
it's time to relax abit le !
hahahahaha ~

I really gonna thank God for giving me the strength
to last through this whole exam period
although so many things happen at home all that

I'm really happy !
My mum came into my room , sit down & gave me a hug ...
she actually gave me the assurance that no matter what happen
she, daddy , my brother & i
the four of us will always be the one family
that nth can seperate us
and that no matter what , even if me & my aunt fight again ...
she will not allow my aunt to cause anymore physical hurt to me
cause she know it's time she gonna protect

My Brother actually came and gave me a big hug !
this is like the first time he give me a hug after three years la
I actually find it hard or dunno how to love my brother because of an incident that happen at home last time .
it makes me so hurt that i just closed up and dunno how to love him
but i just felt so touch when he hug me so tight
made me feel so loved
regardless of how bad i treat him
but just that one hug of his made my heart melts

K larhh i shall post the rest of the things some other time
cause it's late and i gonna catch up on my beauty sleep le
TaTa ~
=================================================

Labels: Drama Queen Signing off ~

Monday, October 6, 2008

..:: Stars Stars ::..

OMG OMG larhh !!!
i'ts now 3:00Am in the morning le
hahahahahahahahahaha
i'm still not asleep wor

Was looking out the window just now
cos someone told me when around 2 or 3 liddat
the clouds will start to clear
that will be the best time to look into the skies
because all the stars stars will be so clear to you
and it's so true !!!
it's actually the first time in my life looking at so many stars !!!
hahahahahaha

All the small small star which normally around 8 plus 9 cannot see de lorh
all blinking blinking at me sia
make me so damm happy =x
i see one row of 3 stars stars
some got colour de lorh
i also dunno why also
hahahahahahaha
got Red,Blue,and Green wor !
believe it or not
go see lorh hahaha
of cos must be the day that got no rain then can see all these beautiful star star

Tata ~
Gonna continue enjoying looking at my stars stars le

Labels: I shine the brightest XD ~

This Deep scar in my heart; I feel like running away

Really feel so tired le
Haix ~
totally no strength to continue this battle
Grant me the strength of urs God

I need ur Love so much
I need someone to care
I need to feel ur peace
I need a hug so much
I NEED YOU ~

LOVE turning into HATE
This is terribly
I don't wanna Hate
but things just get out of control
everyday when i get home
i feel the awkwardness when ever i see u

I cry almost everytime when i think of all these past
those emotional hurts & physical hurts
It can never be erase
How to stand up again i wonder
How will my life be next time bringing all these past with me
I am totally lost already

I feel alone at home
like no one to encourage me
No one to support me
i ask myself " Is my teenage life suspose to be like this ? or should it be happier ? "

Teach me how to LOVE again
Teach me to be Strong
Teach me Learn how to control my emotion
==========================================

Regardless of all this which has happen
i still wanna thank someone who have been there for me all this while
Thx for ur concern
Thx for ur Love
Thx for ur encouragment
Thx for comforting me when i'm crying ( i know i sound super awful )
Thx for listening all my complains
Thx for spending time with me at night to chat
Thx for the attemp to put me to sleep wor LOL

===========================================
Exam is gonna end soon
but i still feel scared
about my math
hmmmmm...
not been able to focus on my exam also
because of all the things happening at home
===========================================

Labels: I needed my Beautiful times back